In regards to other people

After working for a while with the public (a mere 8 months), I have decided that everyone is assumed guilty until proven innocent.  I understand why cops have such a hard time believing someone’s innocence.  After all, if they are not guilty of the crime they are being accused of, then surely something other (as of yet unidentified) has been done.  No one is innocent.  Just like when, as a child, a parent would discipline us for a crime we did not in actuality commit and upon that dawning realization they’d retort, in their own defense no doubt, “I’m sure you’ve done something that deserved punishment that I didn’t catch.”  Well-played Mom and Dad.  Our legal system can’t work that way…for obvious reasons.  But they know.  Those who work with the public know.  If not true on this account, then sometime in the past.  And if not in the past, then in the future.  It’s all a matter of time.

There are no absolutes in human behavior.  Blame it on a lack of religion, morals, ethics, immigration by other culture’s with conflicting values, sex before marriage, or whatever……it doesn’t matter.  It’s here.  And it’s been here since the dawn of time.  Rudeness rules.  Me first.  It’s a damn shame and it’s a losing battle.  Those of us with manners, ethics and a “do-unto-others-as-you’d-have-done-unto-you” Golden Rule are in the minority.  Something tells me though, that we always have been.

[History of bad behaviors]

I claim that this outlook is due to my interactions with the general public but if I were to be completely honest I would admit that there is a strong disposition on my part and nearly half of my family to be suspicious of others and particularly, their motives.  Everyone seems to have one.  I’m sure there are those who are exceptions to the rule.  But they are, just that, an exception. 

Not everyone is as cautious as our Spedowfski lineage is.  I’ve been a skeptic since day one and I can see the lineage of distrust from deep down into my family tree.  It isn’t that anything catastrophic has befallen my family by being deceived by others.  At least nothing that has been recalled by future generations.  But it wouldn’t surprise me in the least if somewhere, far down the line someone was very hurt by another’s dishonesty.  Perhaps my distant relative swore up a solemn oath that he or she would never be someone’s fool again.  And, here we find me.  Today’s offspring.  Or maybe it took a few generations of trusting, good people getting continually screwed over until we evolved into cynics.  I’m not sure.  What I do know is that when it comes to most people, they aren’t to be trusted. 

I distrust equally: both those who appear shady and those that appear too good to be true.  If everyone hates or loves you, I’m equally on guard.  And yes, just as I have found those who are well-loved to be wicked on many accounts, I have also found those who were well-despised to be secretly lovable and kind. 

And yet, like the optimist I am (and trust me, if you think being an optimist and a skeptic at the same time is difficult, you’d be correct), I give each person a chance.  Because I never get over the thrill of finding someone who is still good.  Someone who does the hard thing, the unselfish thing, the RIGHT thing when he or she doesn’t have to.  When you find a diamond like that, in this world full of coal, it ignites your spirits.  It makes your soul sigh a happy sound and a smile come to your face. 

Not only am I appreciative and openly gracious to those good folk, salt of the earth people, but I aim to be that person.  I am aware, I am wise and I am on to you.  But I still have a heart of gold.  I’ll help you.  I just will.  Because someone has to and there isn’t exactly a line forming with willing individuals just dying to be helpful to one another. 

I don’t know what the takeaway message is here for you, Reader.  Maybe it is to distrust many, trust a few and be a safe harbor in the storm for those just like you.  Unless you’re a no-good, self-entitled pushy person who cuts people off in traffic, tries to get out of library fines, and wouldn’t feed a hungry kitten that showed up on your doorstep.  In that case, the takeaway message for you is to stop your shit and think for a little bit.  It ain’t all about you.  Your time is NOT more important that other’s time.  Your life isn’t more important.  Be nice.  Or GTFO.