Stay Calm

Even when it is scary.  Especially when it is scary.  Stay calm.

I hate unpleasant surprises.  I know---nobody likes them.  But I truly hate them.  I mean I actively try to guard against them.  I take actions to ensure they won't crop up: Double-checking insurance coverage, banking account balances, and if the knobs are in “off” position on the stove.

Back in November of 2003 I found myself in a panic. My husband's source of income stopped abruptly.  I worked part-time just to supplement what he made.  The announcement that his income was ceasing caused me to, initially, freak out. It was then that a wise and beautiful angel administered to my mental and emotional woes.

Barbara, an RN where I worked told me, "This is precisely the time to *not* panic!"

I thought she'd lost her damn mind.  To me, this was, incidentally PRECISELY the time to freak out.

But she was right.  When you panic you lose your mind.  Or at least some of its functionality.  If you're aiming to dumb yourself down, panicking is the right course of action.

Sometimes it is a knee-jerk reaction.  When I lose something I tend to flip out initially.  "Where is it? Where could it be? How could I lose it?"  But I never find what I'm looking for until I pray to St. Anthony.  Maybe it is just the act, though, of calming down enough to pray that gets me thinking in an orderly fashion.

Well all of this was fun to think about but I didn't have any real research to back up my "findings" until now.  The Institute of HeartMath is distributing a publication titled, "The Inside Story: Understanding the power of feelings," and on page 25 it states:

"Positive feelings and smooth, even heart rhythms, however, facilitate or improve the brain's ability to process information...." and "This means that our physical reflexes are faster and we can think more clearly.  We can see more options and solutions to problems and situations than we could before."

It is scientifically proven that the popular-again maxim to "keep calm and carry on" is truly timeless, solid advice.

 Now is not the time to lose your shit.

Morning hacks

I am not a morning person. Not, not, not. 

In fact, I have never been cheerful in the mornings.  Even as a youngster my parents told me I was like Grumpy Bear from the Care Bears when they woke me.  Ordinarily, during alert times, I was happy and affectionate.  But first thing in the morning?  Um, no.

As an adult and mother I have tried hard to curb my negativity in the mornings.  But it hasn’t always worked.  Some of my children are naturally morning people.  The others are not.  They clash and I tense.  This is not the way any of us want to start our days.

Which leads me to today.  It is a beautiful, wintry Saturday. I had the luxury of not working this Saturday.  My sleep had been warm, comfortable and pleasant.  Duration was excellent.  I had every reason to be happy and only a few reasons to be unhappy and I did not intend to dwell on them. 

Yet, I still awoke in a funk.  Why? 

As it turns out, there is a name for it (there always is).  It’s called “sleep inertia” and it is the state we find ourselves in as we are waking up and easing into the day.  Some people zip through the process in five quick minutes.  Some of us take up to an hour.  We feel groggy and our brains foggy.  It isn’t detrimental, but it isn’t comfortable.  

But there are things you can do about it.

1: Acknowledge stress-They say there is such a thing as unacknowledged stress.  Just because you desperately want to believe that you are coping fine with life and its myriad changes, doesn’t mean you completely are.  This alone might make you chronically overwhelmed.  Sleep might be the first time we actually allow ourselves to relax completely in a day.  Coming out of this relaxed state and back to whatever daily battle you find yourself in is unsettling. 

2: Make relaxation a priority-If you identify with the above stress (and most of us can), it is suggested that we find time to relax.  This is hard.  But it might require eliminating something that isn’t as necessary as we thought.  It might mean that instead of vegging out in front of the T.V. with the family, we go somewhere else for 5-10 minutes and focus on a relaxing practice of some sort.

2: Include daily pleasurable activities.-So we tend to jam our schedules full of crap that we feel we must do.  Include some fun, pleasurable activities.